English Tutor Charles give the following feedback:
Luke writes very well but needs more practice on his past tenses, the usage of articles, modifiers and action verbs. He made a few spelling mistakes, but that can be corrected easily due to his age. He’s a wonderful boy.
Luke, 8 years old
Luke的本次作文原文：
Chinese New Year
**
I have
a happy festival at 2018, I was in market with my mom and dad. The market was
at Guang Zhou.
I and my mom were
shop on that market for my birthday. My dad and I were eat dinner, after dinner
we play with our fireworks. Then we ated my birthday cake with my mom. We played with my legos,
(blocks), but my bad didn’t know how to make a tank. So I has to help him to
finish building legos. At last we readed books and floded air planes, my mon said,” let’s
go to bed”.
I had a wonderful
night in my whole life! I wish I could have another present for my holidays and
Chinese New Year is my favorite holiday.
外教Charles当堂指导修改后的作文，红色部分为老师指导修改的部分。从修改后的文章看出，内容变得丰满了，一些动词的时态的错误被修正，文章前后句子更通顺，衔接更流畅了。
Chinese New Year (Spring Festival)
I had a happy festival in 2018, I was at the market with my mom and dad. The market was in Guang Zhou.
My mom and I were shopping at the that market for my birthday. My dad and I were eating dinner, after dinner we played with our fireworks. Then we ate my birthday cake with my mom. We played with my Legos, (blocks), we built a tank, but my dad didn’t know how to build a tank. So I had to help him finish building the Lego’s tank. At last we read a few books, and we made and flew airplanes, then my mom said, “let’s go to bed”.
I had the most wonderful night in my whole life! Because it was my birthday and my family and I did a lot of things together. I wish I could get another present for my birthday, and Chinese New Year (Spring Festival), is my favorite holiday, because this holiday is very long.
By Luke (8 years old)
Note: Student must pay attention to： Articles: a, an, the
下面这个视频是Luke小朋友和外教Charles 1对1实时作文修改课的实况录像
下面这个视频是 Debby老师录制的非实时的作文修改点评和反馈 （和写作小班课相对于的作文修改课，家长可以自由选择1对1实时直播课 或者是 非实时的点评修改录像）
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